Becoming Present through Osmosis

Before I left for Peru Karen invited me to Ecstatic Dance—an open free form session moving to world music. Since I have been back, I have been going regularly. The space is perfect for my spontaneous movement and Zhenggong practice (A level four ZYQ practice) where I receive teachings directly through movement. Many times during these practices, I feel the divine coming through me.
At the beginning of the dance, I turn the center of my awareness within, using my peripheral awareness throughout the room. I stretch out stagnant energy channels and points, shake stagnant qi loose and out. Somewhere along the way when I least expect it, the divine touches me, moves me, and becomes me.
Last time I was meditating while dancing, I abruptly had to open my eyes. Near me I saw a man kneeling; his head was bowing all the way down to the floor. His full awareness in his movement was palpable. He surrendered with his whole-being, whole-heartedly, fully present in each mille-second, which slowed time around him, and around me too. All of a sudden, the air around me became tangible. All of a sudden, the beauty of the moment shook me lose, shook me open. All of a sudden, the air above me opened. Divineness came through my being. Tears ran down my face.
Then the energy changed. I felt the Earth energy coming into me. I was pregnant with a great ball of qi in my belly. I held it with my whole being. I adored it. Every cell in my being revolved around it. I loved it with my whole heart, with every bit of my being. Suddenly a thought lit up in me, this is femininity, this is unconditional love and nurturing. This is how our Earth feels about each and every one of us. I am our Earth’s child. More tears streamed down.
After these repeated experiences of deep connection, it became clear to me that by coming into a group, such as this one at Ecstatic Dance or a class or a workshop, I choose to step beyond my personal awareness and merge with a larger, broader group awareness. The group awareness helps me to step beyond my own identity, my own routine ways of thinking.
The group awareness also helps me to make a definable containment, a firm boundary which makes my ego feel safer to explore beyond its usual territory. I, and all of us in the group, can dance/leap/shake and bound outside of our norm and still feel cuddled by the gentle holding of the group. This is the benefit of group practice. If one is already able to meditate in any situation, for example among the fifty thousand children practicing martial arts in the Shaolin Monastery, one learns to use any environment as a tool for focusing one’s awareness more deeply.
This is also why when we come to a qigong meditation class, the teacher offers that broader yet firm boundary that lets us, as students, grow in a nurturing and constructive way. Our spiritual growth needs both the wild intuitive power and the structured disciplined practice.
When one person in a group becomes fully present, everyone around him/her has an easier entry into presence themselves. The change of vibration in the air is noticeable. This effect is another benefit of group practice, especially when practicing with advanced meditation masters. Many of us have had that bliss by osmosis experience while meditating in Mingtang’s presence. But practicing with our peers also can create more chances for deeper awareness.
In the sharing after the dance that night, a woman talked about feeling her spine for the first time. She was beginning to get to know her spine after an accident. These words brought up similar vibrations in me, in my understanding. Only after we have lost something or somebody do we begin to know the importance of that thing or someone. It’s the contrast of having and not having, the duality of this world, that offers us the understanding and awareness of the duality and yet the oneness of God. This is why we go through the challenges that we do in life, isn’t it? Verbalizing our experience clarifies for ourselves that experience, connecting and strengthening the energy channel between our heart and the back of our brain. And at the same time sharing the words brings about understanding and resonance of similar experiences in those within the group as well. The cascading effect of the “Aha!” moment occurs within the group on multiple levels for each individual.
I hope to share our presence, our awareness, our awakenings and our understandings with you in our group practices.